When the rain comes...

It went up to 78 degrees or higher yesterday for the first time all season. The temps have been moderate, but colder than I like for quite some time, so it was great to open the windows and get outside for a bit.
I pushed the mower, or should I tell the truth and say the damn thing dragged me around the yard? I actually ran the mower back and forth through the whole yard, even the areas that hadn't started to grow yet. I felt like one of those obsessive people that have to walk up and down every aisle at the market, even though they don't need to. I need the exercise. The lawn was just as rutted and bumpy as I remembered it.

I also did lots of other things. One of them was to go to the dentist to get a checkup and cleaning. I need to get a tooth fixed and scheduled that for the end of this month.
I came home with a stiff neck, so pushing the mower added to that. The stiff neck is from the stress of sitting in the chair and trying to look calm as an adult should look. Doesn't work. It doesn't fool anyone, and my body still tries anyway.

Last night, I went for a walk just to see if that would loosen me up a bit. It did help, but I was a lot slower than I usually am, and I only covered about a mile before I decided to call it quits. Just after I got home, the storms hit.

The house was 79 all day inside into the evening, even with the windows open and the great breeze. I closed all of them except the one next to my bed, and ran the ceiling fans to cool things off. The storms dropped the overnight temp into the mid 50's, so the house cooled down a bit too. I refused to turn the AC on because I had waited all winter for warm weather.

I had some upsetting dreams and it woke me about 2am, so I hit the bathroom and then tried to go back to sleep. I did fall asleep around 4, and the alarm woke me for the first time in a long time. I usually get up 5 minutes before it goes off.

I drove my bus route, came home and was greeted by a friend to take a walk. It was raining lightly, so I grabbed an umbrella, and we headed out through the neighborhood. After one loop, I told him I was sore and we could try again on Friday, and I went in. He is a slow walker, and just starting out, so it's more of a stroll for me than a real walk, but it does get me out and I enjoy his company.

Well, I really was sore and tired. I came in and took a nap, for an hour and a half! I was awakened by a text from my son, otherwise, I would have slept through noon. I guess I was tired.

The roller coaster continues.

I decided tonight that I was going to gather up the ingredients I need to make another batch of chili. I will use red kidneys this time, along with ground beef and hot sausage links. I cut the skin on the links and pull the sausage into balls and cook them that way before adding them to the mix. I have lots of frozen veggies (spinach, mixed vegetables, and broccoli) along with my tomatoes and spices, so it should be a great combination. I will start cooking tomorrow.

My goal over the next 2 weeks, as far as eating is concerned, is to eat high protein meals made by me and to save the microwave food for times when I am too tired. I would like to get back to basics at least for a little while. It may get a bit monotonous eating the same things all the time, but I did it before, and I want to lose what I gained over the last year, and then continue on to my original goal.

I went down to 202 (my lowest weight post) and am now up around 225 (gained since last year). If I make it to 202, then I want to at least break the magic number of 200. I have pants and a belt I bought that won't fit me until I get below 200 and I hate to waste good clothing.

Unless I get up at 4:30am every morning, I don't have time to make eggs with Canadian bacon as a meal, and oatmeal by itself is not a meal. It lowers my blood sugar unless I eat some protein first. I don't eat cereal because of the celiac, although I do cheat now and again with other meals.
So, I usually make up a microwave "steamer" meal. I eat the protein in the meal first as I'm supposed to, but the meals aren't the best thing for my diet.
So, lunch and dinner will be my own cooking (mostly pre-cooked) and breakfast will have to be worked out. Anyone want to eat chili for breakfast?
I see the Bariatric doctor in July, so I should have time to get back on track by then, along with the help from the "Back on track" program that I start next month.
In the meantime, I am still using walking as my main exercise, and painting, cleaning, and fix up to supplement. I plan to start jogging in bits and pieces during those walks, and gradually expanding my distance.
My personal goals are to investigate warmer weather for this fall and hopefully into the winter so I can be outside as much as possible all year round. I still hope to play my guitar for a living.
Let's see what happens next... Life is Good!

Falling behind

The Back on Track program starts in May, but I need it right now.
I'm falling behind in many things. Oh yes, I am making progress in many areas, but I am getting lazy, or should I say that I am giving in to my laziness.
I am almost 30 pounds up now from last year. I started gaining the weight when my wife got sick. I was hell bent on being selfish and just working on my own personal gains (or losses) when she told me. I lost it. I started eating processed food, and not walking or exercising.
Later, I used my energy on cleaning the house which may have involved some physical labor, or weight lifting, but for the most part was just simple grunt work. It required just plugging away until I got too tired, or bored, or was finished. I should get into the gym, or start my long walks, that I have been planning for a long time now.
So, now, I need to get back on track. I am on my own here, and I am not doing what I want, even though there is no one here to stop me but myself.
I see myself failing, even though I am doing things other may not have been able to do.
I try to see myself succeeding, but I am so tired, scared, and confused.

The world has always spun way too fast for my tastes. Too many things are going on, and I can't stop watching them, or wanting to learn about them.

All of my skills are self taught, with a few minor lessons reading, watching TV, or from watching my father when he used to work. I can do things if I concentrate, but there are some things that are beyond my abilities or knowledge.
So, I walk around the house, dressed up in my ADD, and do things. As I clean out one room, I find things that don't belong there, and I take them to another room, where I do something else, until I finally get back to the first task a few minutes later.
I am a fan of organization mainly because I don't have any of it.
So, every room in the house has some thing finished, and some not.
I tried taking Ritalin to stay on track, but it gave me the shakes and I couldn't get anything done other than sit at the computer and write. The problem there is my hands shook making it impossible to type more than a few letters before making a mistake and I had to go back and correct that mistake.
Right now, I am typing this because my cordless drill died and needs to be recharged. I managed to get the computer room cleaned up, the old curtains removed and trashed. I took all the hardware off the windows, and got 2 of the 3 brackets installed before the battery died. When I finally finish this window, the curtains that have been there since at least 1990 will be gone. That has to count for something.
I spent too many hours sitting in front of the TV this week. I kept looking at all the things that needed to be done, and the things that have to be done on a regular basis, and didn't do much of them. I did all the normal things like dishes, and laundry, but the floor in the back bedroom still has glue on it. This room has glue on the floor too. I think if I started doing both rooms today, I could finish them by next weekend, if the fumes didn't kill me first.
I have to cut the grass, either today or tomorrow. I have not done that yet. It's not really long, just uneven. The first cut of the season is always the most rewarding. It makes the lawn look good. With all the rain we had, you would think the grass would be longer, but it isn't time to wake it up yet. Tomorrow, the temperature is set to go over 80 for one day, so the grass will pop up after that. I like pushing the mower, even though it is busy work. I can put my mind in neutral and just walk back and forth with my ear plugs in. I measured it after my WLS and it came out that I was walking almost 4 miles when I finished. It involves lots of stopping and turning, so the aerobic benefits aren't there, but the physical is sure there. My yard is bumpy. My ankles sure get a work out! I was going to try to get a roller to level out the yard, but didn't yet. Another thing to do....
I took out 4 bags of trash from the garage this week, along with some larger pieces that the trash men were nice enough to take along with them. I bagged some things that shouldn't have been bagged, but I just wanted to get rid of it without having to take it to the dump myself.
I have several cans of paint that I have to take over to the hazardous waste site sometime.
I have several places to work on. I will go down to the basement soon and get rid of more stuff. When I leave here, I want to take as little as possible.

I think I allowed my ADD to lead me through this post, and I'm going to leave it alone for now.