Early dismissal

I have an early dismissal this morning which breaks up my day and makes the end of the day much sooner, so I thought I'd turn out a quick report here.
I went to see the Bariatric surgeon yesterday for my 18 month check up.
My guy is the one who looks at Obesity as a disease, and treats it as such.
We went through all the check points, pain, discomfort, any problems, vitals.
No real problems with the bariatric stuff. No dumping, discomfort, overfullness, etc.
He thinks I am doing fine for my situation. He is aware of my wife's condition, and offered comfort. I think I could use some more of that great pain med! No, wait, it's habit forming big time, and dangerous. Damn!
I gained one pound over the last time I was there, but he thinks that is fine.
I actually lost weight and then gained it back just recently.
I feel like I have a weight hanging down from my heart, and it's taking everything I have to hold it up.
My body is doing fine, but I am cheating a bit due to the stress. Comfort food?
I was down to 202, but just couldn't break the 200 barrier. I will do that in the next few months no matter what happens at home. Just watch me!
So, my official weight is 208, up from 207 6 months ago.
ArrrrRRRRRRGGGGGHHHH!
Life is good.

Labels

I would like to express my opinion on medical labels.
These are the names they give to people who behave in a certain way, or do thing differently than the "normal" folks.
Labels such as:

• A.D.D. - Attention deficit disorder
• A.D.H.D. - Same as above with the "H" standing for hyperactivity
• Bi-polar - Manic depressive. They have a million different labels for this one
• Asberger syndrome - now it is a part of a bigger label, which is....
• Autism - This is when you have a specific set of problems that doesn't allow you to fit into the general population.

There are other labels related to the above labels, such as O.D.D., which is an oppositional deficit disorder, but I will comment in general about all of the above listed labels in this thread.

In general, I used to think that a label was a good thing. Now, I am not so sure.
I read an article in the Sunday paper, yesterday. It spoke of Autism and Asberger's and how they were related. I was curious about the symptoms of the so-called diseases, so I read through to that point.
Well, the symptoms of the two are similar (according to the article), and they pretty much match me to a T.

• I don't like to have contact with people for the most part. I like my privacy.
• I don't like to communicate for the most part because I hate the process of socializing. It always seemed to me to be archaic, and just plain silly. It also required me to lie and make up things, and I certainly didn't like that.
• I have excelled in some things, and not in others. I have the ability to "hyper-focus" on things I am interested in, and totally ignore things that don't interest me.
• I hate sitting still, although now that I am older, I am a bit slower. I can sit still when I have to, but I don't like it.

There are other things that I noticed about myself, that match the things listed in the article, that I won't bother with here.
The point I am trying to make, is that I study people a lot instead of interacting with them. Yes, I am a ham onstage when I play guitar, sing, or M.C.. But, that is someone else up there, not me.
I would rather not interact in large groups of people. Too much incoming data to digest. I'm not happy in crowds. I don't like standing in line and will go out of my way to avoid doing that. I don't like being in a cattle call type of situation, such as everyone lining up to get a flu shot. I will avoid that at all costs.
Flying is OK, but the wait in the crowd and getting onto the plane is agony for me. Once I'm on, I can deal with it if I have something to do rather than sleep or stare into nothingness.
I like having a few close friends who know me and accept me for who I am. In that case, I enjoy long conversations of give and take. I can listen, or I can talk. I like that.
So with all that said, how am I different than others? I don't know anyone who enjoys standing in line, or being in a crowd pushing their way to go somewhere. I don't know anyone who enjoys losing their individuality by joining a Cattle call.
I am just one of those who expresses my feeling about not liking it. That allows some educated idiot to assign a label to me.
The article ended by telling the reader that they were going to eliminate Asberger's syndrome from the group of labels.
In other words, those of you who have been labeled with Asberger's, will have to find something else to blame for the fact that you are normal, and everyone else are just liars.
I'll bet that Asberger himself is happy that he will no longer be known for an offshoot of Autism, and might be considered just a good Doctor.
I think my A.D.D. is still safe for now. Otherwise, I might not have an excuse either!

Sunday

I didn't really want to do it, but I drove the school bus for a Sports run yesterday.
I left the garage around 6:20am, picked up the wrestling team at 6:45am, and got back to the garage about 6:30 that evening.
I spent the day talking with another driver who didn't recognize me. I had been fat when I last saw him. It took him awhile until he realized who he was talking to.

I took a short nap in the bus covered up with my down coat, but that was really short because of my sleep apnea. I kept waking up because I wasn't breathing. I thought that that would go away with the weight loss, but apparently not.
I also went inside the school and watched the wrestlers in order to warm up.
The school bus cools down quickly, and won't warm up unless it is being driven. So, even if we are sitting there with the engine running, it is still cold. The outside temperature was around 17 all day with a clear sky and lots of sun. The sun really didn't help because the wind was blowing hard. Walking from the bus to the school was torture, even with long johns, and a goose down coat.
I spent time driving down to the local Turkey Hill to get some cash and food (a small wrap) to supplement my peanut/cashew/raisin baggie. I also brought a protein bar and a shaker bottle of protein drink with me from home. It cooled down very nicely in the freezing bus.
I didn't think my feet would ever thaw!
When it came time to pick up the kids, I took the bus on a short drive down the road before I got them. That way the heater started to kick in. The bus warmed up after that.
So, I got 12 hours of work time added to my regular paycheck. I get another extra run in two weeks. This time, the trip will be longer, but the day will be shorter. They are only meeting with one team instead of 6. It's not a meet, in other words, just a match.
I started to write this morning, but realized that what is in my head will not come out easily. I am writing from my experience, and fighting with myself to write what I feel, and not cover up the emotions. It's tough because I have hidden my feelings away for so long now. It seems as if all I have left is anger.

I also started to list my stuff for sale in order to clean things up in my life. I think I spoke of that in a previous post. It's winter, and just after the holidays, so I'm not getting any nibbles even though the equipment is good and should be in demand.

I was trying to organize the small studio so I could set up my 6 foot table in order to do some work, but it turns out there is not enough room. So, I will have to relocate to the basement I think. It's still too cold, but I may just get around that by taking the space heaters down and spending the money to run them.

I guess I should mention that we had a great meeting the other night at support group. I learned a bit about food choices I hadn't known, and have to look up a few ideas.
The guest speaker was a plastic surgeon, but since I am not interested in having that done, I only half listened. The best part of the meeting was afterwards when we split into groups to talk. We are going to do that every month now, and may even have more than one meeting, so we have more time to discuss problems, tips and tricks.

Our Bariatric office is going to be selling vitamins and such directly starting in March, and it will be at their cost, so that will be a good thing. Our Dietitian likes to be on the cutting edge and is always showing us new things, so this should be great. I ordered my last vitamins and calcium online and they came through a bit crushed and crumbled. Hopefully, they will not be that way at the office.
My wife is still taking up most of my time, but she is getting stronger again and is not as much trouble. She will have one week off before she starts her next course of chemo, so I am hoping to get more "me" stuff done.

Oh, one more thing: I met someone at the meeting that I didn't recognize until they introduced themselves and told me where I knew them. I couldn't believe it, but it was the lady who was in the next room from me and had her surgery roughly the same time. You would never know that she was a Post! She looked great. She had makeup and hair done and could be a model. She not only looked good, but she was glowing and happy. I'm hoping that she contacts me on Facebook so we can catch up and compare notes. She told me that she reads the blog from time to time.