Milestones
I thank Wendy, Greg, Kristin, and Dr. Brader for allowing me to speak tonight.
Now, a little background on me.
My name is Lee Feldman
I was born in 1953, in
I have two grown children and 3 grand kids, with another on the way.
After getting married in 1976, we moved many times and finally ended up in
I was involved with the Lions Club, East Petersburg Fire Company, and the East Petersburg Day Committee, all volunteer.
I have driven some kind of bus since 1974 for my main source of income.
I am/was a Disc Jockey since 1994 or so.
I have played guitar since I was 11.
My hobbies are music, listening and playing, researching my past, including finding old friends and acquaintances through the Internet, riding my Honda Helix, and writing my memoirs.
I am 5’7” tall.
When I started my quest to lose weight and keep it off, I weighed in at over 305 pounds. I have lost weight many times, but have never been able to keep it off.
I had my surgery on July 31st.
I now weigh in around 230 and my goal is to go all the way back down to 155, which is what I weighed when I got married 32 years ago.
I feel great!
So, what is my definition of a milestone?
A milestone along the road marks the starting point in a journey. Every mile, there is a new mile marker showing how far you have gone, and how much further you have to go.
If you want to go 5 miles, you have to pass by markers 2 through 4 in order to get to mile marker 5.
The mile markers may go by un-noticed, but the milestones I want to concentrate on here, are the ones that affect you. These are the ones you notice along the way.
Unlike a road that has a beginning and an end, this type of journey has a starting point, but it can go on as long as you are here on earth.
Your decision to get the surgery is milestone zero. This is the point where you decided to finally lose the weight and keep it off for life. But more than this, it is the point that you will change your life forever. You are not going back in time; rather, you are starting over, with a very good chance of success.
Your surgery date is mile marker zero. This may or may not be a milestone for you.
A mile marker is a point along your path.
Look for the first thing you will remember for the rest of your life. That’s the Milestone.
A Milestone is a memory on your journey.
The points along the way from mile marker one are:
- The hoops you have to jump through with the insurance company to qualify for the surgery.
- Deciding whether to tell your friends and loved ones about your decision.
- Preparation for the surgery.
- Changing the way you think about foods.
- Planning exercise.
- Gathering the items you need for after the surgery.
- Making the decision to do it right this time.
- Reading everything you get instead of just putting it aside.
Your milestone is something that you decide. In order to get there, you have to travel along a path that is different from everyone else, and yet, there are many who are on this same journey. You are not alone.
Something simple:
• Your pants are too big
• You aren’t recognized by a friend you haven’t seen for awhile
• You fit into a booth at the local restaurant
• You buy a pair of shoes that tie, instead of slip ons.
• You are able to stand up from the couch without moaning, or planning ahead.
• You can climb into the back seat of a car.
• You no longer have to buy double or triple X clothing.
• You can actually fit into an airplane seat and actually fasten the seatbelt.
• You can trot up the stairs without causing an earthquake, or getting out of breath.
Here are some ideas for you to think about.
• If you were shy, will you still be that way?
• If you used coping mechanisms to hide your emotions, will you be able to let go of them? How will you do that?
• Will you still get angry at the same things?
• What are you going to keep and what will you discard? What are you going to change?
• Will you still think of yourself as fat?
• Will you ever think of yourself as “normal”?
• Will you let anyone stop you, or change your mind?
• Will you stay here, or will you move and start over?
I can hear myself say “oh, I would never do that!”. Or, “I really don’t like to do that”. That’s my coping mechanism at work. I was really saying, “I’m too fat” or out of shape to do that.
So what do you really want to do that you couldn’t do before? When will you be able to do it?
I think that milestones may be different for younger people than with older folks like me.
I am starting over, with more energy, the ability to do more than I could in years, yet, I have experiences and excess emotional baggage than the younger folks.
I would like to hear from those younger people so I can get a feel for the differences and similarities.
I am listing my email and blog address. I would like as many people as possible to contribute to the blog so that we can help each other through what will be an exciting journey, not without it’s roadblocks, and potholes.
Please feel free to write to me. I will keep your names private unless you give me permission to publish it.
I would like to see recipes, ideas for exercise, stories, milestones reached, and if you would like to meet with others to celebrate your achievements.
I have already gotten some great ideas from some Post surgery people. I would like to get more. We all need all the help we can get.
Someday soon, I will be able to leave the nest and walk on my own through the world.
I wish you all that same great feeling.
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