Donating blood

Just a quick message this morning.
I will be donating 15 tubes of blood this morning to be tested as I do every 3 months or so. I am hoping this is one of the last times, although my doctor has vowed to keep in touch for the rest of my life.
I have never had this kind of coverage before.
The downside, is that the insurance only covers so much, and I owe $600 from the last time. The total for the tests is around $2000.00 each time.
Oh well, it's worth every penny.
I am looking forward for the first time in years, instead of back. I have made contact with many people and managed to find closure with all but a few. I am interested in what I will be doing in the near future, and I think I have found my path.
It's about time.
Maybe I will grow up?



NAH!

Day 4 of 5!

I got to run the mower yesterday while is was still warm outside. I actually made it through the whole yard with only two breaks. I felt good at the end, but I was tired.
My mower is the old 2 cycle kind that you have to add oil to the gas in order to run it. It also doesn't have a self propelled drive. I used it to lose 27 pounds before the surgery, and now it seems I am going to use it to lose another 10 pounds in addition to whatever I lose on top of that.
I have been at my plateau forever it seems. I vary on the home scale between 212 and 217 depending on how much water I have inside me.
My mind is reeling too. I have been dreaming and remembering my dreams recently. They seem to answer questions I have been asking myself for years. It is amazing and scary at the same time.
I notice my personality changing too. I am much quieter now, and when I see or hear something that I don't agree with, I speak up loudly. I have taken to trying to keep quiet more and learning to listen, but I sometimes can't seem to help myself.
I have been spending a lot of time on Facebook too. I have been looking for an old partner of mine. She is one of the last people from my past that I really want to talk to. I have some unfinished business with her, and I need to apologize also.
I hope the people reading this blog can understand the changes that are going on with me as I lose weight and journey down this strange new path. I hope it helps them to find their own way.
Tomorrow, I should be contacted by the sleep study people to get me my new CPAP machine. They told me the pressure was too high and they recommended reducing it quite a bit. I am glad to hear that. I should be able to get a new machine paid for by insurance. My old machine is well worn and almost ready to be replaced. I am one of the few that actually use the machine every night. Many people can't seem to adapt to it. I feel bad for them. This machine has made life much better for me.
Oh, for the record, I cheated yesterday: I made a fillet Mignon, and added strips of bacon, and fried onions! Oh, how good that was!!!!!!

Long weekend!

Taken before surgery!








I have a 5 day weekend. Isn't that great?
I took the day yesterday to do a bunch of things. I was testing myself to see if I could keep going.

• I did the dishes
• I did the laundry
• I actually made a list of what I needed to do! (WOW!)

All of this before 8am. I got up at my usual time of 4:45am. The laundry was washed, dried, and put away.
I set up the crock pot for making my killer chili too, before 8.
Then....

• I went to Home Depot and bought a shut off valve for the hot water line. I also bought a shower plumbing set (Faucet, shower head, and ball for turning it on and off. And, a much needed replacement toilet seat.
  
• I went to Weis and got my chili fixins, as well as an RX for my wife.
• I started the chili, and set it to simmer for four hours. I used sausage this time, and kept the seasonings to a minimum. I did get a few hot peppers to drop in. The sausage was listed as "hot" too. Trust me, it is hot. I love it!
  

All of this before noon.
After I finished the chili prep to simmer (Add the beans an hour before eating), I cleaned out the bathroom closet, and took the tub fixtures off. I then climbed into the closet to access the water lines. Oh, I also turned the water off and drained the lines. Lots of trips up and down the stairs.
I cleaned off the old stuff and ended up frustrated, because the copper lines and the new fixtures aren't "plug and play". They require me to take the old lines off and install new ones. I didn't have time or energy to do that by the end of the day.
About this time, Paul started banging on my door because I had the music turned up and couldn't hear him. He talked me into taking a ride on the scooters to get away for a little while. Since my Helix is not running, I took my Metro (top speed of 38mph) which takes forever to reach top speed. It was a long slow ride for Paul, but I enjoyed it. He took a picture of our scoots in front of a barn. The view was fantastic.
I put the shower back together and tested the water lines for leaks, dropped the beans into the chili, and managed to clean up before my wife got home.
Oh, I also collected the trash, and took it to the curb.
And, I did all the dishes, pots and pans before I went to bed. The crock pot was dry and put away this morning.
So, I proved to myself that I could do the work. I am still sore today, and I took a nap this afternoon, but managed to go out and look at ride on mowers. I did some other things too, but really took it easy compared to yesterday.
Tomorrow, I will install the new toilet seat, and cut the grass with my non self-propelled push mower. I lost 27 pounds before the surgery last year with it's help, and I guess a riding mower will have to wait. So, I hope to lose 10 pounds over the next few weeks. I started to go down a little this week, so my plateau may be over.
I hope so.

Thoughts to help me move forward!

I didn't do this surgery to go to work at something I don't like.
I didn't do the surgery to look good again.
I did it to live.
I am going to live.
I am going to move forward every day until God decides I've done enough.
I am cleaning out the house, and cleaning out my mind. My mind isn't what it used to be, though. I forget things, and I don't have the youthful energy that I thought I would have.
I am fighting low blood sugar and pain that wasn't there when I was young. I am fighting years of relaxing when I should have been active.
I need to balance relaxation with work, needs versus wants.
I need a vacation. I want a vacation. What I have are bills and taxes out the wazoo!

Comments on the meeting last night 4/2/09

Once again, my brain didn't work.
I told people about this blog, and I gave them the address backwards. I hope they find their way here despite this.
The meeting was excellent. One of our post people introduced an aquatic fitness instructor who spoke about using the YMCA as a way of building the muscle without pain. It was a good program. I will look into it. There is a rec center closer to me than the Y that I will check out too.
We broke into groups after that, and I got the chance to hang with the "post" people. This is always a good thing because it re-enforces things that I learned but maybe forgot along the way.
Because of the information I got last night, I will be making some needed changes to my diet and exercise program.
I have way too many things I want to catch up on that I left go before God answered my prayers.

• Does anyone want to babysit me to make sure I start to write my books? I have 3 of them just waiting to get out of my brain. I need to manage my time better so I can write and exercise, and work at the same time. I get stuck, and can't break free.
• Talking about jobs, I need to find one that is full time, or I need to find another source of income in addition to my school bus driving. I have my DJ equipment, but have been holding off on that for some time.
• I need to play my guitar. I am going to do that very soon. I have songs that I want to write, and songs that are already written by others that I want to play. I have a very close friend who has accepted me for who I am. He plays and I want to work with him, but I don't have anything to present to him just yet. Again, it all comes down to scheduling my time, and doing it.

I need to break my fear of success and my fear of failure. They are one and the same, but I still haven't been able to beat either one.

Thursday

So, what do you eat?
I know that the amount of food is much less than it used to be, but the quality of food is much greater.
I don't eat fast food anymore. Wow, what a change!
But is it interesting that food has been something that is so much more important to me now. Thinking about food, and planning meals takes much of my time now. That is something I didn't do before.
I still go to Bob Evan's once a month. I go to the Akron Restaurant too. But I don't go to Wendy's, or Pizza Hut.
I do go to Two Cousin's Pizza because they have lots more than Pizza. They have great salads. I don't eat the bread for the most part, but I do cheat now and again.
My meals at home have stayed the same and I am trying to mix things up a bit, but this is proving to be very tough.
I am glad to be driving a school bus (Van) because the schedule allows me to make my meals at home. I still eat my killer chili, but even that has changed.
This week, I added spinach to some already made chili. This was the bottom of the pot with very little beef, so I "beefed" it up with the spinach and a bit of refried beans.
My exercise program is suffering some. I am doing so much around the house now, and taking care of computerwork (it used to be paper!). I am very active compared to before, but I am not working out this week with heavy weights. I guess I am tired and sore from last week's water heater replacement. I am still tweaking that. I would not like to do that for a living.
Today, I will bring up trash from the basement to be taken to the curb. I will make numerous trips up and down the stairs. I have to cut up the box that the water heater came in, and have a pile of other stuff. I don't think I can get the old water heater up by myself, but I will look at it and see. I am not ready to ask for help there yet, because my new body may be able to do it on it's own.
I have to contact a satellite TV company to see how much they really charge for service. Their start up costs and starting discounts are so deceptive. I am really tired of paying Comcast Cable to see infomercials on TV. Cable is way too high. $768 a year to watch infomercials?
I have cut hundreds of dollars by switching my insurance to Geico. I have a friend that switched and he has had experience with their actual service that was positive, so i checked into it, and found them to be very helpful. That service starts tomorrow.
I cut back on energy usage and improved our comfort level. I am warmer now than before.
I need to get to a dentist to have a tooth fixed. My regular dentist can't do the work.
I have new glasses and can see again.
So, I have made great progress.
Now, let's hope the government comes to it's sense and doesn't take everything away in their effort to create Hope and Change!

The heck with it!

I've been giving this a lot of thought, and after many days and nights of sleepless days and nights, I've decided to call Dr. Brader and ask him to reverse my operation.
I feel as if all the hassle of trying to eat small portions just isn't worth all the hassle of eating small portions.
I think I have learned enough now to lose the weight on my own now instead of later, and other times.
Besides, I already have a head and the rest of my body start.
So, forget whatever you read. It just isn't worth it.

Next meeting

The next meeting is this Thursday, April Tooth!
It will be at Lancaster General Hospital again. They are working on the new building and should be finished for us to use in June!
There should be some other events scheduled, and I will post them as they become available.
Contact me if you need information, directions, or just want to talk.

This past week

I did a few things I haven't done for awhile, or before.
I had some roadblocks and I am now moving them out of the way.

• I did up a stew that is great, and mixed it down to make it last.

• We went to Levittown last Saturday to support a Facebook friend, and Neshaminy Alumni. He had a CD release party at a place called "Cheeseburger in Paradise". I called out to a bunch of folks, and we had a nice reunion. Friends from Pennsbury showed up, and it was great. We stayed at the booth for about 3 and a half hours! We got to hear Michael Francis Hughes (I will try to remember to post his website). The waitress was great and we tipped her very well. She was happy about that. Nice memories were shared, stories were told, claims were made, no disclaimers!

• I am supposed to be going for a sleep study to lower the pressure on my CPAP machine, but I may not go because there is quite a charge involved and I can't really afford it. I will have to put up with the strong wind blowing all night.

• I put an ad on a website to try to get some music going.I have been playing guitar since I was 11. Last weekend, I saw my old friend and original guitar teacher. He and I were friends first. We played music to get girls and we did! Not as many as I would have liked, but you can never get enough now, can you?
• I took pictures of my guitar in order to send it out to the builder so he can post an updated shot on the website.
• I did a workout today while wearing leg weights. I pumped on the total gym, and did more free weights than I have in quite some time. It felt good, but I could feel it when my energy levels dropped. I had a bottle of protein drink with me and sipped it throughout.
• Then, I carried some of the junk up the stairs, and took it to the trash pile. I will take it down to the curb tomorrow night if I can still walk! I still have a truckload of stuff to bring up, but this is a new part of my life. Every time I come up the stairs from now on, I will carry stuff until it is gone. The leg weights are 5 pounds each and feel like they are 100 pounds!
• I am talking with my best friend about building a design that we have been talking about for months. It is a speaker system that is a miniature of a concert system. I will use it in small clubs. If we do it right, it will sound great and be able to be heard clearly. My buddy has CAD programs for this type of thing, so as soon as we finish with that, we will start to gather materials and assemble it. I didn't know how complex this could be.

• I am down to 215. These last 3 pounds have been the toughest so far. I think I am building muscle and my body may be getting used to the lack of food. So, every weekend, I will try to mix thing sup a bit food wise, and exercise wise. For the past two months, I have been eating pretty much the same thing everyday. I will start mixing that up. Also, it is getting warmer, so I will get out more often.

My Helix won't start, so I may take the Metro out soon. I have to dust off the 21 speed and get that going.
Anyone want to buy some music equipment? I will have it listed soon.

Aroma!

I am basking in the aroma of a new stew!
I did pretty much the same thing as I always do, with the exception of adding tomatoes.
I added red, yellow, and green peppers, red skin and white onions, scallions, lots of spices, black beans, beef cubes, and white potatoes.
I am going to check the freezer for spinach or other frozen veggies. I might have some green beans or snap peas. The more, the merrier!
There should be plenty of protein and complex carbs from the veggies.
Dinner is at 5pm sharp!

Wow, what a weekend!

I spent more energy in the past 3 days, than I spent in a month when I was fat. I did things I couldn't do, or at least, had to plan carefully to make sure I didn't collapse.
What a great thing this surgery was!
Friday, I did a workout to end all workouts. I hit blinding speeds of 3.5 mph on my treadmill at grades up to 6%. I stopped the treadmill every 5 to 10 minutes to do a workout on my total gym, or use the free weights. So, I was doing circuit training, and mixing it up pretty good. I actually went for 40 minutes, and hit 85 to 90% of my maximum capacity according to the heart monitor on the treadmill.
I got up Saturday morning and took a walk with my music. I covered the 3 mile loop at a fast pace for the most part.
I don't get tired as much as I get sore now. I have yet to get out of breath, but I really haven't pushed myself yet. I am still afraid of getting hurt and slowing my progress.
Now, in the fat days, I would have quit at that point for the rest of the weekend, but this day, I decided to go shopping. I took my wife and we visited 2 furniture stores, an RV place, and a Dunkin Donuts! We were out for about two or 3 hours, and even stopped at the Humane League to look at dogs. Sadly, they were sparse. I have been thinking about a 4 legged friend ever since I lost my two collies. They only had pit bulls at the humane league, and I don't want a pit bull.
I felt a bit sore on Sunday, but I went to Maryland and picked up my grand daughter, and we went to Ikea. I carried her a lot of the way, after she decided it was too much to walk. I did put her in the shopping cart about 3/4 of the way through the store. If you've never been to Ikea, you are missing a real treat.
I bought a desk chair that I couldn't find anywhere else, at a price that was soooo low.
Then, we went to a play park, but she fell asleep before we could get inside. So, I took her back home and sat and talked to my daughter for a few hours before coming home to write this.
All in all, I spent a very satisfying weekend and didn't once think about where the nearest seat was in case my fat legs couldn't hold me up anymore.
I am throwing out the sweater I wore today because it is so big on me as to be totally unusable. The arms are stretched out into orangutan length. I remember just barely fitting into it a few short years ago. Now, it just hangs. It is threadbare and worn out. Bye bye.

As time goes by....

It has been my experience that as time goes on, the post Bariatric people seem to lose interest in the whole thing.
This is both good and bad.
It's good that they don't have to think about the surgery, and they consider themselves able to handle life without worry.
It's bad, because some of them fall off the wagon and have a tough time getting back on.
My heart goes out to them, because this is by far the best tool I have found for losing the weight and keeping it off.
The whole of America is concentrated on trying to get us to eat more, and all of the things that aren't good for us. We are bombarded with drugs on TV, and Fast food franchises trying to convince us that their fish has a name, so that makes it healthy and good for us.
For convenience, we can eat our meals as pop tarts, or instant liquid drinks. We are "ensured" it will be the best thing for us.
I don't remember the last time they advertised vegetables, or fruits.
So, without support, how can we handle this onslaught?

Before, during, and now!

The first picture is when I was at my heaviest. I weighed in at 305 or more. This was one of the pictures that convinced me to either die or live. I prayed to God for just that. Either Kill me, or make me better.

This is the first post surgery picture. The belt I am wearing is a measure of my progress, waist wise. My starting waist was 52+ inches. I think I lost around 60 pounds at this point.

This picture was taken today (you can see the date stamp in the lower left). I am now 218 and feeling great, especially compared to picture number one. My waist is now at 42 and dropping. I still have another 70 pounds to go, or more. I am working hard on that.

I miss hearing Paul Harvey, but now, you know the rest of the story!

Life's been good to me so far! Joe Walsh!

The meeting was another monster!
Attendance was so big, that they had to open up the adjoining room. There were people lined up and down the walls!
Amazing!
The speaker was a Post Patient from Lifespan, which is a social worker/therapy type clinic. Her discipline is of course Bariatrics.
She spoke about the changes that happen to us and the people around us before, during, and after the surgery. Her boyfriend was there to offer his viewpoint from time to time.
They were very interesting, informative, and entertaining.
We never got to break into groups and that was a disappointment to me.
Not to belittle the speaker, but this is supposed to be a support group, not an informative talk. It's good to have these people speak to us, but I really feel that I need to hear others around me offering tips and tricks, personal experiences as well as understanding about what we are going through. I will express this to the team and suggest to them that they consider having an extra meeting just for post people to do that.
On a similar note, I am making two changes in my medical team:

1. I have found another family doctor, and am leaving my present one. I did this because I have not been satisfied this doctor has been meeting my needs. I found one closer to my home and it is actually within walking distance. I had my records copied and had to pay a pretty penny to have them done. But, now I actually have them and have read them. An eye opening experience. I bought a multi-function machine to copy them into my computer so I will have them in the future.
2. I am in the process of looking for a psychological counselor familiar with post Bariatric problems. I have spoken with counselors before when my son and I were dealing with ADD and all the other letters, and found it very helpful. I am not ready to check into the funny farm yet, though!

There are so many things I want to do, and have no idea of how to do them. So, I am working as hard as I can, and trying not to burn myself out.
If anyone would like to help, I have a list! I plan to make some real money in the next few years, as well as fulfill some of my dreams and goals. Money has never been my motivator, but I am looking forward to making some and getting out of debt, and feeling good about my life and my accomplishments.

I have many things that I want to do, and I have said this before:

Last year, I was getting ready to die. This year, I am getting ready to live.

Meeting notice

March 5th, tomorrow night (Thursday) is the next support group meeting.
This time, it's being held at the Lancaster General Hospital, instead of the Health Campus.
This is because of the large number of people (not the number of large people!) who have been showing up. The room we were in at the Health campus is full to over full.
So, until they open up the new office, we will have to bite the bullet and hang out in the thriving metropolis of Lancaster City (UGH!). I hate the city, any city, but I guess I'll be there.
They have information available about where to park and it is free, so you don't have to drop your hard earned money.
So, show up, and learn something, and know that you are not alone in your quest to lose weight and keep it off!

The Daily (under Links)

I use this as my home page. I listed the main page so you can pick which one you would like.
I use the Daily Bikini, of course.
This page has so many listings for searching that you can spend lots of your free time surfing around. There are lots of links listed too. Some are for interest, and others for information.
If you like it, send copies to your friends. If you don't like it, send it to your enemies!
Enjoy!

Mike the Post poster!

His name is Mike, and he is posting comments throughout the blog. His first comment is on the post before this one.
Remember, your experiences are different than his. He is an expert only in that he had the surgery way back before many of us.
Take what he says with a grain of salt. Take everything I say with a grain of salt too while you're at it. I am not an expert either.
Feel free to email me and ask questions. Or, you can find both of us on Facebook and ask us there.

Facebook!

I guess it's time to talk about it since so many people are there.
Face Book!
I was able to find many of my old classmates, and connect with some friends I haven't seen in way too long.
I have traded stories with folks, and debated stuff there, and avoided the games and gifts. I also caught a virus that my computer hasn't forgiven me yet.
Now, I found a fellow Post Bariatric patient. He is much further down the path than I am, so I asked him to comment about some questions, and see if I could pass them on here. He said yes, so I will do that as it happens.
If you go onto Facebook, you can join his group: the Staple Club. He asks many of the same questions, so people from both here and there can see them.

Holding pattern

Life has been at a stall speed for almost a month now.
I need to make more changes in order to move into the second phase of my weight loss.
My insurance company assigns a nurse to oversee things and to make comments.
This week, after talking to me for about an hour, she sent me a glucometer with instructions on how to use it. I am not interested in doing that, and am resisting. I can tell my blood sugar is dropping and take measures to correct it on my own.
She also has to make these disclaimer statements after everything she says to cover her butt for the insurance company.
I don't know how she can make any suggestions when she doesn't have my medical history in front of her.

Also,
I found a Facebook friend who just told me he had the surgery done back in 2000. I asked him to write some stuff for this blog and he said he would. I was interested in what it feels like after 8 or 9 years and he agreed to do that. I don't know if he will, but I'm hoping.

And,
I have another new FB friend who is making some very interesting suggestions about types of food. This person is from another part of the country, and they use different ingredients. All of the food here in Central PA is so bland, so this should really be a welcome addition to my diet. Maybe it's what I need to move on?

Next

Ok, the Doctor had a situation requiring him to reschedule the appointment.
So, I made an appointment with my Chiropractor for tomorrow, and will see Dr. Brader next Monday.
That gives me time to further recover from my hospital stay. I feel strong, but have taken some time off to think.
I had a visit tonight from the "Scootin Fool". He came over to introduce me to his son, and to show off his new lights. I would have liked to take a ride with him, but I tried to start my Helix, and it was too cold and too long between runs, and she wouldn't kick over. I have to get a trickle charger to keep the battery charged. It's much smaller than a car battery, and harder to get to. I have to remove the seat and make sure the cables don't lay over onto the metal and short out.
I took some pictures of the scooter in the dark to show off the LED blue lights. Now, I will try to send them to him so he can post them. I am not real good at doing that, but I'll try until I succeed.
So, I thought today:
If it took me all these years to learn how to eat wrong, and get set in my ways, how long will it take me to break all those bad habits and replace them with good habits?
I know the answer......but I ain't tellin you!