How about so far?

I have been chugging along, doing stuff, and feeling as if I'm not going anywhere.
But, I really am moving forward, and I like that.

"Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans. "
John Lennon

Progress? (The opposite of Congress)

• I wanted to take my scooter apart. I started to do it, but it was too cold in the garage. I will take my space heater out there before the weekend is up and try some more. I took the screws out of one side (the lower side) and the small leg faring was cracked and brittle. It fell apart in my hands, so I have to replace that. OEM parts are expensive (that small plastic thing is $54.00!), and I don't have any disposable income to replace it right now. The scooter is held together with lots of screws and I am keeping them in a bag so I don't lose them.
• I wanted to write. I haven't written. I have been taking care of my wife and the house. Yesterday while she was having her 2nd dose of chemo (a 4 hour process), I came home, vacuumed, dusted, and moved furniture in the living room to make things easier. I also put away the two Christmas decorations (really neat little fiber optic trees) so the cat would have somewhere to sleep again. They were blocking her from getting into the window sill.
• I wanted to walk. I haven't walked, although I have gone out of my way at the health campus when I took my wife over. She wasn't happy because I made her walk with me. She wants to sleep and lay around and I won't allow that when I know she needs to move. I'm nasty that way.
• I wanted to play my guitar. I haven't done that. I have thought about giving it up altogether, but decided to wait on that. I hate waiting.

I did manage to book a gig this Saturday for my DJ business. It's a freebee for the local kids who are bored. I will be playing for 2 hours over at the community building in the park. The music has been filtered and picked out, so all I have to do is show up with my equipment and push play. Then, my hands will be free to cover my ears for two hours.

I also got many other things done that weren't on my list. Lots of thinking and reconsidering.

Another Lennon quote:
Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.

The week after Christmas

Tomorrow, we are heading over to the Oncologist for standard blood work, and approval for round two of my wife's chemotherapy on Tuesday. I spoke of this before.

I would like to go visit my Parent's graves, but I guess I won't get there this week.

So, now is the time to look back and see what I did the past year. I think I am looking forward at this point. I just finished reading what I wrote and that's the way it seems. I hope you don't mind.

I went from a triple X to a Medium. No big deal, right?

I can tie my shoes now.

I can see and cut my toenails.

I can walk for miles and miles, and not just think about it.

I can do more than one thing per day.

I can cut grass with or without a self propelled Mower.

I can rake leaves everyday without being too tired or sore.

I can climb around over, under, around, and through my Helix. I can ride it too.

I can actually get on the elliptical machine and travel round and round for 20 minutes at a time.

I can lift weights, carry boxes, sort through stuff, and climb the stairs as many times as I need in one day, and do it again tomorrow.

I can shovel the driveway (14 inches of snow) everyday for a week. Yes, I got sore from this one. But, I didn't die, or even feel like I was dying.

I can eat when I want, and still lose weight. I can control my eating and not eat something I'm not supposed to eat without too much guilt.

I now have more discipline than I have ever had before that I can remember.

I can fit behind the wheel of a subcompact.

I can sit at a booth in a restaurant. I can sit at a table too.

I can refuse water or any drink with my meal. I can ask for a container without having to explain myself.

I can feel "normal" most of the time, instead of having to ask for special help.

I don't cringe when I hear of something more that I have to do. I can do a little more if I have to.

Wow!

In the next year:

• I will attempt to lose the last 50 pounds.

• I will try to run. 5 or 10 miles, mostly cross country, rather than on the road. I might like to try some extreme running, such as running along over rocks and hills.

• I will try to do something I haven't done before. I am still thinking about skydiving.

• I want to write at least one book out of 3 that I have in my head.

• I want to start my own business so I can make money when I want. I don't want to work for someone else anymore. That's something I have wanted to do most of my married life (34 years). I still would like to go into business with someone else, so we can support each other as we climb the ladder. I hate working alone.
• I either want to finish my home or move somewhere else. I need to redo most of the home now that I have it emptied out. I need a new kitchen and bathroom. I need to add another bathroom. I need to finish the porch, heat the garage, oh Hell, I need to redo the whole place. The house will be around for another 100 years or so. It might as well be updated. I welcome any help and donations can be made too!
• I want to play my guitar onstage until I am good again. I was good once. Maybe I can do it again?

I have so many more things I want to do in the future. Let's see where I am this time next year....

A slight caffeine departure

I made the mistake of making high test coffee instead of decaf this morning, so forgive me if I am suddenly coherent. I make more sense when I am on a caffeine high. My ADHD....

Hey Barry, whatever happened to macros? I would love to have a series of keystrokes recorded instead of having to do all this repetitive stuff all the time. Am I missing something?

The Christmas photo is someones idea of overkill for the holiday. They live on the other side of east Pete. You should see the helicopter on the left side of the house.

I spent the last week working with my wife to make sure she is comfortable. I had both sets of grand kids here over two days, but had to make sure they didn't jump on my wife.

I have to say that I am off my game. I gained just a few pounds because of my sedentary nature these past few days. I want to go out, but my wife takes my time right now.

I went out to the garage yesterday to take the scooter apart, but it was way too cold to work for long. The cold cuts me to the bone. I had thought about taking one of the little space heaters out there, but didn't. I got a good look at my Helix, and started to take the millions of screws off in order to remove the body panels.
This scooter probably has more weight due to screws, nut and bolts, than it does for the plastic panels that cover it. You can't imagine how ugly this bike is without panels! But whoever designed it really had no idea of how to be frugal. They put screws in where there was no need. The neat thing about it is, each panel fits together just right. There is no need for all the screws.

So, I decided to treat myself and order the lower panels online instead of just painting them. The plastic is a bit brittle and worn. One of the pieces broke apart in my hands yesterday. Looking at the picture, this is just about the lower panels for now. They are the ones colored black. The upper panels are worn too, but much more expensive to replace right now. They do have 3 choices for upper body panels:

1. White
2. Black
3. unfinished

I will go for the white panels. I always liked white. This will make the scooter look brand new again. The lower panels will all be black or gray, I'm not sure which.
The biggest worry I have is that the panels were made for the Chinese clone of the Helix. Those parts are usually way below standard quality. The unfinished parts require me to have some skill in painting, and even with the spray cans, I am not that good.

So, what does all this have to do with Bariatric?

Well, I'll let you figure that out until the end of this post, and then I'll answer the question.

During the week, I wanted to write, but was too brain tired to do it, so I just did housework and prepared myself for the onslaught of kids.

My wife got her "buzz" haircut yesterday. I must say it was shocking at first. I am now married to Kojak, or Yul Brenner. She has a super nice wig, as well as some really great looking caps to cover up, and after the initial shock, I don't mind at all. She seems to be taking it well too. We expected her hair to fall out, and were ready for it. But, it still affected us.
I took her to Weis yesterday while she was wearing her wig, and she had no trouble talking with one of our neighbors there. They made no indication that they knew she was wearing a wig. It looks very natural. I won't post a picture here, but if you email me, I might send you a picture.

Oh, good coffee!

Looking at our finances, we are in trouble. I need to get a "real" job to cover for our losses, but with the want ads only 2 pages big (usually 20+ pages) things don't look good. I tried my hand at one of those online thingies, but they don't really work. I can't figure them out. I must be too dumb or something.
I also signed up for Upromise, which is a reward program to give my grand kids money for their future education, but it doesn't work for me. You see, with the new diet, I don't buy a lot of what they give discounts for. So far, I think I have 2 cents in savings. I'll check my lottery ticket this morning and if I win, I'll make sure they have enough for their future. If not, I'll just pray they do OK on their own.

I have some ideas for a book, but as listed above, I just didn't get to it yet. I'm gonna fix that soon.

So, I will write another blog entry about all of my accomplishments in the past year because of my Weight loss. And more important, what I want to do next year. It is a good feeling knowing that there is a good chance that I will achieve my goals.

Life is good!


Oh, by the way...... I would never have been able to complain about all of this if it wasn't for my Bariatric weight loss. That's worth a lot to me. I would probably have been dead now and my wife would have had to make her journey herself. At least, I am here to help her. As down as I feel right now, that is worth everything I have lived up to this point.

The holidays for me

To me, this is the worst possible time of year.
I enjoy giving gifts and talking to people, but all of my youth comes back to me, and most of it are not the good parts.
I had lots of good times, and some bad times as everyone has, but the bad times come back to me.

Since I am used to holding in my thoughts and feelings, it hurts to let them out. Of course, I feel better after I let them out, but it still hurts.
I also despise the time after the holidays.
I walk the streets here in East Petersburg, and I see all the beautiful lights (and the not so beautiful ones too!).

After the holidays, some folks hold onto the lights as long as they can. But most, just put them away and that's the end of it.
I enjoy the lights the most. When they are put away, there is a real feeling of emptiness, and let down.
I keep hoping to be able to one day hide out on an island somewhere so I can miss the holiday.

Sometime this weekend, I will be taking a trip to Philadelphia to visit my parent's graves. They are buried in two different cemeteries, on opposite sides of the city, so it will be fun getting there. My Dad is buried next to his second wife, near my grandparents. That's a long story for another time.

This holiday, I have planned to take my Helix apart and paint it, and perform some cosmetic work to it. I also plan to write a story.

One other thing:

I have to decide what to do about my music. I have played guitar since I was 11. I loved doing it back then and made great money at the same time. i was in demand, and quite good at the craft of playing and entertaining. I gave it up for marriage and family obligations. I did play a bit over the years for fun, but never achieved the level of success I had when I was younger. I miss it.

I tried to replace it by becoming a DJ, both on the air and mobile. I worked at various stations in the area, and had a mobile DJ service going until I got too fat.

I still have all of my equipment, although my music collection is a bit dated and could use some freshening up.

My mood is somber, and that's not a good trait for a DJ who wants to entertain people.

My weight loss has come to a halt due to my somber mood, the pressures of my wife's problems, and my willingness to succumb to those problems.

But, life is good.

Alcohol and WLS

This is an interesting article on the subject of alcohol.
I don't really have much to add to the topic since I don't really drink. I did try it for medicinal purposes, as I think I wrote about in an earlier post, and I can tell you it works to help me sleep.
I do agree that the effect is quick to come and go. It's as if it really wasn't there.
I like the feeling too much so I will not drink even when I am able.
Beer is carbonated, so I won't even try that. I used to like the fake beer, but that's OK, I'll pass.
We have about 8 inches of snow on the ground right now, and it's getting deeper quickly, so I think I'll go out and try my hand at shoveling, just for the exercise. I got the car inspected and some stuff fixed, and I went out this morning. The snow is powdery and not too slippery, but with the temps rising over the next few days, it will be a mess.
All things considered, I would rather be somewhere warm watching it on TV!

Illiteracy when it comes to computers!

I got to a certain point in my learning curve dealing with computers, the internet, and all things digital.
Some things just don't make sense to me, unless someone explains them.

I decided to redo my blog format as a way to educate myself to new things digital.

This blog is now easier for me to read because I don't have to scroll down as much to read one post.
All of the other stuff is at the bottom, except for the commercials of course.
I like to change my fonts, but can't find enough variety, so I usually just stick with one or two.
The colors here are pretty bland too, but that's OK.

I will go in and try to figure more stuff out as time allows.

Recipes: poultry/corn soup

You can make your own recipes by experimenting, or by following someone Else's ideas.
So, this morning, I made some soup.
I don't drink soup, but my wife does, and the kind I make will work for me too. It is thicker than the usual soup, which makes it OK for me.

Last week, I cooked a turkey on my Ron Popeil Rotisserie. I added my favorite seasonings. I don't use fake stuff anymore, except for sugar. I figure that since I only eat a small amount of food, I can use the good stuff and get away with it.

So, I made a coating mix of vinegar, a half stick of real butter, and olive oil. I melted them in a cup and used a paint brush to paint the turkey as it rotated. I also added the other half stick to the inside of the turkey.

I make up stuffing separately because I can't eat it (Celiac), but my wife does.

So, when the turkey was finished, I had some with a side of veggies. Then, I broke up the rest.

The dark meat went to a chili I made using beans, seasonings, a bit of this and that. You can find my chili recipe and make your own. I froze it in portions for the near future.

The white meat, I also divided into quart size portions.

Today, I pulled out the old crock pot.

• 1 to 2 pounds of cooked poultry. You may use turkey, chicken, or any other that you cook and break apart. No, you have to get rid of the skin.
  
• 32 ounces of chicken stock (I use Swanson liquid. I bought it from BJ's)
• 2 quarts of water. You may use less if you want it to cook down faster.
  
• 3/15 oz. cans of corn (not creamed). You may add more if you like. Make sure to drain the water. Most canned corn has sugar in it. Why?
  
• Added seasonings to taste: Salt, Pepper, Oregano, Parsley. (I would add hot peppers, or sauce, but the wife doesn't like them, so I'll add them afterwards)
  
• Add any veggies you like, as long as they are in the background, and don't bury the main course. Onions are great, green beans, peas, celery. Bell peppers aren't the best choice but you can if you want. Kidney beans turns it into a type of chili to me, and I have enough chili for now.
  
• 1 large bag of wide egg noodles.

In the large crock pot, add the water and broth. Add the seasonings and stir to mix. Taste and add as you need. Cook the liquid on high.

In a separate pot, cook the egg noodles according to directions. Add to crock pot after draining. Do not rinse.

While the noodles are cooking, add the cooked poultry to the crock pot, making sure to break it into smaller pieces. Don't leave any large pieces because it is hard to drink soup with large chunks.

Add the corn and any veggies to the crock pot.

Add the noodles to the crock pot when ready.

Let the crock pot simmer on high, with the lid slightly vented for a few hours until the liquid decreases to your tastes.

At this point, the mix is ready when you are.

So now, I have turkey and can use it to make a series of meals. I save money, and get some good protein. Since I have it stored in the freezer, if I find any other recipe ideas, I can pull it out and I am ready to go.

Now, if only I was allowed to eat bread, gluten, bagels, pizza......I miss them!

But,

Life

is

Good!

Da Shrink

I highly recommend going to see a therapist after you are a bit settled in your routine as a post bariatric patient.
There are all kinds of things they can help you find and help you fix.
If nothing else, you can have someone to talk to about your problems that doesn't have a stake in the outcome. This makes it easier to talk about things you need to get out in the open, in private. (think about that)

Addictive behavior has many faces and doesn't go away. If you fed your addiction with food, and now, you can't do that, the addiction will pop up as something else. You need to watch out for it. The next addiction will probably get easier to deal with, and will be less dangerous to your health, hopefully.

With time and practice, you will find someone who understands your bariatric problems as well as other problems.

I was lucky enough to have found a post bariatric counselor. This person went through the ordeal about a year before me, so they understand a lot of what I am going through. If you can also find a post patient counselor, you've got it made.

Now, let me talk about alcohol for a few minutes:

I am not an alcoholic. I drank when I was a teen, and into my early twenties. I almost never got drunk, and I didn't crave it.

Alcohol used to make my nose stuffy, and I didn't like that.

When I went onstage, I would order a Blackberry brandy and soda, and then I would sip it through the first set. Then, I had a deal with the bartender where ever I played. If someone bought me a drink, and lots did, he would make me a non-alcohol soda and tell the person I was drinking rum and coke or something similar.

So, when I quit drinking in 1983 (there's a personal reason I won't talk about here), it was no big deal. I have had alcohol since then, and still want to talk about it here.
My Mother used to make me a drink with whiskey and hot tea with honey when I got sick. She would force me to drink it and then bury me under the covers until I sweat the bug out. It used to work well, especially when I had been sick for a few days.
I tried that a few times since 1983. I found out that it didn't work as well because I guess I didn't have enough alcohol in my system with just one shot. I probably needed to drink half of the bottle, and I wasn't willing to do that.

I was warned by my dietitian not to drink without having a designated driver because of the strange effects of booze on bariatric patients. She also warned me to wait a few years to even try it.
Since I don't drink and probably won't take it up, I filed the info away until a week or so ago.
You see, my tastes changed.
I used to have maybe one cup of coffee every few days. Now, I drink it everyday, and usually more than one cup (always decaf!).
So, did my tastes for alcohol change? I wondered.....

With bariatric patients, alcohol has a very strong effect initially. This is how it works:

• You take one shot of whatever.
• The hooch takes effect almost instantly, and hits hard. If you try to stand up suddenly, you will feel it.
• After about 20 minutes, the effect wears off, and you are almost totally sober again.

It's kind of like the difference between analog and digital. Analog takes time to warm up. Digital is almost instant.

Now, one shot is not a lot. But, if you repeat that shot a few times, you will get pretty messed up and stay that way.

So, it's kind of funny the way hooch affects us. I can have a shot of something, or a mixed drink, and walk out 20 minutes later totally sober.

Can you begin to see how this could be very dangerous for post bariatric patients with addictive behavior?

I know one person who goes out to drink almost every weekend. They replaced food with alcohol. The don't just drink one shot. I feel for them because they could fix the problem easily if they chose and still enjoy a drink once in awhile.

So, this past week, I was overwhelmed with emotion, and needed to escape. So, with my evening cup of mocha (cur of coffee with a packet of sugar free hot cocoa powder), I added a half shot of creme de cocoa.
Wow, what an effect!
I drank the stuff just before bed. I got instantly high. The room spun around, and I had trouble focusing. I finished the cup, and headed to bed. I slept like a rock. I felt better in the morning.
I decided I liked the feeling, and I might do it again, but I won't ever do it all the time. Once or twice a year will be OK for me. Things are pretty rough right now (see my previous posts), but they will get better soon, I hope and pray.
Now, on with the story....

I don't believe my addictive behavior was overeating, but it might have been. I believe I didn't take care of myself. I spent all my time taking care of my family, and everyone else but me. I thought I was invincible. I found out I was wrong.

No matter what happens now, I have a second chance, and I will do my best to make it a good thing for me.

If I'm not here, none of this matters....

Life is still good.

Oh am I tired!

What a week so far.

I took my wife in for her chemotherapy today. Yesterday, she was taking the prep medicines, and apparently, she had a slight allergic reaction that caused a tickle in her throat. This caused her to cough every few seconds, no matter how much she tried not to. Ugh!
She was up all night and I was too because of the noise, and the fact that I was worried about her.
When I did sleep, I saw the Angel of death hanging around.

I got up at 4:45am, and left for work around 5:45 after making sure my wife was awake. I layed the house phone across the room from her, and moved her cell phone, so she would have to get up to search for it. She always answers the phone no matter what, so it worked as a great double alarm clock. Then, when I was on the road, I called her on both phones, one after the other.

I got home before 8 from my school bus run, and took my wife over to the Health Campus for her first chemo session.
After I got her settled, I headed home, took a shower, ate something, did the dishes, and headed back to pick her up around 11:00am.

Wrong!

I had to wait with her until 1pm because they started her drip very slowly so she would adapt to the poison entering her body.
The worst is yet to come. Believe me, I wouldn't ever do this to myself.
So, after my afternoon bus run, I cooked dinner for us, then I took a walk in the dark to see the Christmas lights in the neighborhood.

I am now sitting here typing and getting ready for an early night.
The meeting at the Bariatric Clinic was a good one. We listened to and participated with the exercise physiologists as they talked about, you guessed it, exercise. Good meeting.

I went to the WLS steering committee meeting last night, and was able to influence the future of the meeting in a positive way. I'll talk about that another time.
Oh, am I tired!
Life is good!

Balance

I didn't really start to gain weight until I started working. I was doing many 12 hours shifts, and then playing all night. My energy was being burned off too fast and I got tired. It was easier to just fix something quick as long as it had lots of flavor, cheese, and other fat laden foods.
When I started sleeping in because I wasn't getting enough sleep, the weight went up.
So, when I lost my balance, I gained weight.
What are those things that I needed for balance?

• The proper mindset - This one is key. If we had no emotions, weight loss wouldn't be an issue.
• Sleep - Many people think they can get by with less sleep. Wrong. They are probably so fatigued that they are shortening their life. I am a firm believer in getting a nap every day as well as a full night's sleep.
• Schedule - I am a firm believer in maintaining a schedule. I get up early, even on the weekends. My body and mind are happier. The one thing I do, is to not use an alarm clock. That allows me to sleep just a little longer. If I find that I am sleeping more than an hour later than usual, I know that there is something wrong. It's a great signal to help me fix things before they get too bad.
  
• The physical body - Everyone is built slightly different. We have different blood types, we are different sizes and shapes. Our chemical makeup can cause problems, as well as helping us.
  
• Location - Living in this particular part of the country (Central Pennsylvania), I have been told, exposes us to almost all of the bugs that exist in the United States to make us sick. For a person living here all their life, they adapt by getting sick and developing immunities. So, this is a benefit. For folks coming here from other areas of the country, this may not be a good thing. Many of them get sick, and some of them die. My cousin moved here from Florida. He got sick and almost died. He spent weeks in the hospital.
  
• The seasons - We gain weight in the fall. We are animals. Our bodies store fat which is converted into food, when food isn't available. It also insulates our bodies so we burn that food slower. This is not something we can control. I am not sure if the folks who live in a non-seasonal area have the same problems. I know I do. As the spring arrives, we should begin to become more active and thus burn off the extra fat, but you know how that works.
• Available food choices - The key word here is choice. That little word can really mess us up. (or is it us who are doing the messing?) If we had no choice but to eat a pre-arranged caloric/nutritious meal, we wouldn't have the problem. But, we have choice. And that allows us to cheat, or get lazy.
• Our beliefs - if you think you can succeed or fail, you are right. Don't blame anyone except the one you see in the mirror every morning.
  
• Support - this is the smallest part of the balance unless we are being abused. If we are being forced to act in ways that aren't conducive to acting as close to normal, we might have a problem. But, most problems we experience, can be controlled, or changed. If we are being abused, physically or mentally, we can always leave. We may make excuses to not do so, but then that becomes our problem. This is the smallest part of the balance system, as I said above. We are supposed to be the ones in control of ourselves, so think twice about blaming others before you look at yourself. (sounds like a song)
• Health - how badly have you messed up your system before you started this diet? If you are morbidly obese, you probably have other health problems caused by your weight. You may or may not be able to overcome these problems. If you can, good for you. If not, God bless you.
• Faith - your religious beliefs can help you.
  

So, balance consists of all of the above, and maybe more that I don't know about. If there were just 3 or 4, it would be easy to balance yourself. Add on the variations, and unknown factors, and you are lucky to have found bariatric surgery.
I sure was.
Life is good!

Can you give up fast food?

I sure couldn't do that before my surgery.
I am a big fan of the lousy beef burgers at McD's, Wendy's, BK, and all the others. I didn't care what they were made of. If they were burgers, I ate them.
I used to go to McDonald's and get their single cheeseburgers. I would buy 4 at a time, add super sized fries, and a large chocolate shake.
Wendy's was even better for me, because I could get a double, everything but onions and mayo, with cheese, a large order of fries, and a large bowl of chili. Oh, and don't forget the large chocolate frosty.
When I was finished, I could barely move, but I was oh so full!
I got started with this eating habit way back when I was a teen. My friend and I would ride our bikes to the Gino's, or to Dick's deli, and fill up. We would be coming back from getting paid for our paper routes, and would spend a large portion of the $15.00 on junk food. Then, we might ride in the other direction for about 10 miles, and buy plastic models (cars, ships, etc.).
I was learning how to wrestle too, so I was burning lots of calories. I never noticed the weight gain, because I was burning it off as fast as I was taking it in.
I can walk right past these places now. I feel good!
Life is good!

What is a diet?

A diet is something that I've heard of, but have found to be impossible to follow for any length of time.
It is impossible to reach the goal listed at the beginning of the diet.
I just can't do it.
Richard Simmons came out with a book on dieting back in the early 80's.
He renamed the diet. He called it the "Live it!"
He told his story and how he had gone on a crash diet after getting a note that someone wrote and put on his windshield.
It said "Fat people die. Please don't die".
He lost weight the wrong way. He fasted until he was ready to drop. But, for him, it worked.
He lost most of his hair and the fast threatened his health.
Then, he decided to help others who were fat, to lose weight.
So, he came up with his "Live it" program.
It incorporated using your brain, your body, and common sense eating.
Every morning, I got up, and did a series of stretching exercises. I had to take the book and look at the pictures for the first week or so. After awhile, I started to get the hang of it. I started to feel better, but I still didn't like exercising.
I never worked up a sweat doing the exercises, but I knew they were doing me some good. My heart would be beating and I would feel awake all morning, instead of feeling like I needed more sleep.
I also followed his diet plan, which was very diverse and offered no chance for boredom.
But then, life caught up to me. I started cheating on the diet because of laziness and fatigue. I was working a split shift and starting about 4:15am and going until 9pm. I had two kids and a wife, and all kinds of other stuff going on. So, I cheated. Not only that, but I stopped doing the exercises, and I gained back the 35 pounds I lost.
Now Richard Simmons had some great ideas. They work if you don't quit and don't cheat.
The "Live it" was supposed to be for life, but, life had other plans.
Richard Simmons had a series of other diets and he made a good living helping people to understand exercise and nutrition. I learned a lot from him. But, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stay with him.
So, in conclusion:
A diet is unattainable for me. I can't lose weight and keep it off without help.
I found that help through gastric bypass surgery. It is incorporated with a support group, an exercise plan, and a dietitian.
The fact that I now have an empty nest, also helps. I have fewer distraction, although my wife's health has been threatening the plan.
I have maintained my weight loss since I started this plan. I still haven't lost all the weight I wanted to lose, but that's OK, because I am still following the plan.
July 2008 until now, I am down 102 pounds, and will never gain that weight back as long as I have this little pouch instead of a two gallon stomach.

Walking and driving

I rode the Helix today for about a half hour. It was very cold on the bike since I like to ride fast. I hit speeds up to 74 mph. I was dressed warm with Silk lined leather gloves, a T shirt, sweat shirt, and jacket, and my "Buff" over my head and under the helmet.
It did warm up this afternoon to around 60 degrees, and the sun was very strong.

We went for a walk on the Junction Road rail trail. My wife used her Oxygen and it worked well, but she was unable to go much further than the first quarter mile. We turned around and headed back at a very slow pace. But, we got to walk in the sunshine.

Much of our time this weekend was spent in front of the TV watching the House and garden channel and dreaming about finishing the kitchen and bathroom which we have no money to do. But, we have ideas about what we would like to do.

I've eaten turkey in some form every day since Thursday, and plan to thaw and cook another turkey in the next few weeks in order to open up the freezer and save money. I can add it to my chili instead of the beef this time around for a bit of variety.

I took another walk this afternoon when we got home. This allowed me to walk at a much faster pace. My body is still adjusting to the weight loss, and I pop and crack as well as meander along the street. I walked last night too.

And, I started a search for a new dog. We went to the Humane Society to see what they had. I'm looking for a dog that can walk with me with as little control as possible. I am thinking about a German Shepherd, or other larger dog. I had a collie and a border collie, but they both passed on a few years back. Now that I have the energy, I would like to have a companion to walk with, and someone who can stay with my wife when I can't be here.

Thanksgiving

It was an easy Thanksgiving meal this year. Everyone was calm and quiet. The grand kids were well behaved. My son in law did a superb job of cooking with help from his daughter and wife.
We arrived, sat down and were served right away. Nice work, Eric. You missed your calling. The heck with computer science! You should be a cook!
Sadly, I had a small piece of turkey, dark meat. A half teaspoon of smashed potatoes, stuffing (not gluten free, but so what?), asparagus (maybe 4 small stalks), wonderful gravy with mushrooms, and then, I was full!
Damn!
Last year, I tried the cranberry sauce. This was the jellied stuff that comes in a can. I used to be able to eat the whole can along with two helpings of everything else on the table. Then, I would down a piece of Pumpkin pie with whipped cream on top. This year, I knew better than to try it. Eric even made his own cranberry sauce, but I didn't try that either.

After we ate, I asked Lilly if she would take a walk with me and she said "Yes!".
She got her socks and big rubber boots on because it was still wet in Maryland, and off we went. We walked over to the golf course and we talked about what we saw. Then, she saw a large bird (great blue heron) and wanted to see it closer.
On the way, there were two puddles. She gingerly stepped through the first one, but I told her she could splash in the second since it wasn't too deep. She stomped up to the puddle and jumped in!
Then, she couldn't stop her forward momentum and she fell forward onto her knees. Her jeans, jacket, hands, and face got soaked.
She looked upset but I dispersed her concern and we headed back home. It was a bit chilly so I made sure we moved quickly.
Her mommy dried her off, and got her into new clothes. She curled up under the blanket on the couch with Grandma.
After that, the turkey had it's desired effect and she went upstairs and took a nap. She was disappointed when she woke up because we had already left.
We had time to sit and talk with our daughter, and we got to play with Jackson who is a ball of energy. He is standing up, but not on his own yet. He rolls rather than crawls, but he is showing signs of attaining that feat soon. He has one tooth showing with lots of drool.
I would rather have a quiet meal like this with a few family members, than to have the total chaos of the whole family any day.
Well, at least part one is over.
I bought over 100 beanie babies for $15.00 a week ago. I gave Lilly a large fish, and a jellyfish. Since we met her at the aquarium in Baltimore a few weeks ago, she made the connection and is happy to have these two creatures in her collection.
I will give out beanie babies to my kids on the bus for the holiday coming up. I forget the name of the holiday, but it will come to me.

Buddy list

A few of the folks I've met at the WLS meetings have recently gone through the surgery, or are very close to their new life.
I was planning to spend time at the hospital visiting them and helping them make it through the tough times.
I guess that will have to take a back seat to life, which has other ideas.
I was one floor below the Bariatric clinic today, and didn't have time to go up and say hi. My wife has 3 different doctors with three different disciplines that are going to oversee her Gamma knife surgery.
They measured her cancer in the brain at 6.5 cm as of the time they took the pictures about 2 weeks ago. The surgery for her should be easy, but the preparation by the doctors is pretty intense as far as I can see.
Gamma Rays are deadly in the wrong dose, and I guess it would ruin their day if they had an "oops".
She started her anti hormone therapy this past week, and so far doesn't seem to have any serious side effects. She is complaining of itching, but then again, I am itching too so it's probably the dry indoor air.
I received two samples from Catalina Life sciences. They are the Bariatric advantage Chocolate and Vanilla protein powders. The chocolate is very good. I will try the vanilla tomorrow in my yogurt. I need a change so this might be the route to take.
I have a very nice neighbor making dinner tonight for us, so I have to go get ready. Gotta pick up some more pills at the pharmacy for my wife too.

Wife update

My wife was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer as you might know.
The cancer has spread to her brain.
We were concerned that she might have it in her lung too, but tests showed that she is clear so far.
They did drain her pleural cavity of fluid which was keeping her from breathing fully.
She has been dealing with cancer since she was a teen and had Hodgkins disease.
The radiation treatment she had back then was what caused the breast cancer now.
On December 2nd, she is scheduled for Gamma knife surgery to remove the cancer from her brain. If you get the chance, look it up. It is amazing how they figured out how to kill the cancer without destroying other tissue.
She is going through an old school form of chemo for her breast cancer. She can't have the modern version because of her Gamma knife treatment.
Everything she has is treatable, but, it is not a cure. It will come back, and eventually, it will take her life.
I was concerned about quality of life, but I will cross that bridge sometime in the future because she is doing well now.
She is still working, and only uses Oxygen when she has to.
This has affected my weight loss because I am working that much harder to make sure she is comfortable.
I am also stressed out quite a bit because her future and mine is not certain.
My financial future is almost certain because I will not have any money when all is finished. I will have to declare bankruptcy for sure, and I won't have a wife.
Life is still good, but it isn't easy.

Weight, Wait!

So, just when did weight loss stop being an issue for me?
I don't really know, but it was just recently. I haven't been on the scale for a week or more, and it doesn't matter.
I plateaued and may even have gained a pound or so. But, I am balanced again.
I can do stuff again without worrying about collapsing.
Last night, as an example, I ran with the mower. I pushed it as fast as I could and covered the whole lawn in record time. I actually got a bit winded.
It felt good.
People still ask me how much I lost. They still comment on how good I look. I still make the same comments that "I feel great". It's a standard answer and allows me to move on quickly.

2 years ago, I was interested in finding a grave site that I liked. I wanted to make sure that everything that people found of mine after I died would not make me out to be some deviant monster or someone I wasn't. Yeah, I did my share of surfing porn on the web, but that wasn't the only thing I did.
I have done my share of research on everything from medicine, religion, biographies, home improvement, and just about every other subject you can imagine.
I was trying to figure out if it really made any difference at all what happened to my stuff after I died.
I thought I might have some stuff that had value as collectibles, but found out I had nothing but stuff. My collection of BK toys, or my Winross trucks are worth much less than I paid for them.
My record collection is only worth listening to and not making money from. I have a big band album collection that has never been played. After looking it up, I found it is not in demand, so I will keep it for no good reason.
Even my hand built custom made amplifier and guitar are only worth playing and not selling.
So, I considered selling it all for whatever I could get, and then taking off on the road to see the country before I died.
I felt lousy. I couldn't put my shoes on without great discomfort. My doctors were shaking their heads in disbelief, and throwing me 1200 calorie diets in hopes that I would lose weight.

Now, I find interest in life again.
I may still sell everything and go. But this time, I will be able to concentrate on the scenery outside me and not on my fat, sick body.
Here is an interesting link I found through a colleague. Maybe someone would want to help me design these for the US and help me to market them so I can pay some bills and stop driving bus?

Piano Stairs

A little something different

I have been buying an extra large cup of decaf coffee from Dunkin Donuts for as long as I can remember. I do this as a treat to myself.
2 sweet and lows
usually skim milk, but sometimes I forget and get cream.
Rarely do i have it black.
Most of the time, I have them add a mocha swirl. This is not part of the diet, but I do it anyway. It has sugar in it. I don't have nay reaction to it, so I attribute that to the size of the cup. I also tell them to take it easy on the mocha, but you know them!
I have to double check that they give me decaf also, because sometimes they forget.

So, I try not to mix the drink up too much while I drive. This way, the chocolate settles to the bottom and I don't get too much at one time.

I only drink about half of it while out on the road. (I drive my school bus for about 1.5 hours)

I bring the rest home, and park it in the fridge.

Here's the good part:

I add two scoops of protein powder to it, and then pour in water or more decaf coffee. The coffee is cold, not hot.

It makes drinking the protein much better for me.

Clothing, and other unmentionables

I get catalogs. I like getting them. I signed up for one years ago, and they just started arriving. Before the age of the Internet, I actually used to order things from them.
I bought this great Parka, every few years, from JC Penneys. It was good down to 10 below, and covered me up just fine. It was very warm, and comfortable. When it would wear out, I would just buy another one from the catalog.
I first found them in the store, and later, they moved them to the catalog. Now, I can't find them anymore. BTW, they cost $29.95 and never went up in price during the 15 years I wore them.

When we moved to Lancaster County, I got on some mailing lists, and started getting the LL Bean catalog, and later the Lands End, and other outdoors type catalogs. They are great in the bathroom!

I started buying goose down coats ($70) a few years ago. They were cheap like the parka, and so much warmer. Most of them came with hoods, but I never really used them.
My wife bought me a Mad Bomber Hat a few years ago to keep my head warm. This thing is huge. She thought since I was a double X everywhere else, that my head was also a XX. Wrong!
But, I love this hat. It is made from rabbit fur and rip stop nylon, and is so warm that I can only wear it on very cold days. I also would like to try it when I ride my Helix, but haven't yet. I imagine it will be great for that if I buckle it down.

So, the other day, I got a new catalog. It got me to thinking about things.
I just lost weight.
I got rid of all of my clothes. My sweaters were all too big, and most were worn out, so I tossed them.
I have two or three sweatshirts, two pair of jeans, lots of pocket Ts, socks and underwear. I have no dress shirts, and only one pair of dress pants. That's it.

So, what would happen if I started ordering new clothing from Cabela's catalog?

Well, I'd go broke. Absolutely, positively broke.

Socks are from $9.99 a pair, all the way up to $22.00! Well, I would need at least 7 pair, and probably different styles. Some for warmth, some for comfort inside. So, maybe 3 different styles, and 7 pair each. That's 21 pair of socks minimum.

Their jeans start at $30 a pair. I paid $17.00 at Wal Mart. So, I would need at least 4 pair of jeans. Add on 4 pair of dress pants.

Shirts? Oh my, what a choice. Add on sweaters, long underwear, hats, gloves, boots for the snow. Shoes for walking, hiking, climbing, and don't forget the moccasins. They look toasty! Right now, I use the booties I got when I was in the hospital. They only cost $20,000.00 and seven holes in my stomach!

One shirt from the catalog is $40! Buy 7 of them, add on some for a change in style and multiply by 7 again.

Don't forget the variety of coats for the different seasons and weather conditions.

When I first thought about this entry, I was going to go through the catalog and actually document everything so I could see the total cost. I decided that that was a waste of time. I can estimate just as well.

Now, of course, I wouldn't be able to buy a dress suit or two from Cabelas, so I would have to shop somewhere else for that. Add on dress shoes, socks again.

Then, I imagine I would need other things not mentioned here.

I have lived a very simple life as far as clothing. I think you might remember my post about living simply. I buy several different colors of the same basic clothing, and that saves time and money.

But, I really would like to have the money to go shopping full force at a place like Cabelas, or LL Beans. Maybe more than once.

Would $5000.00 do it? No, I don't think so.

Jos. A. Bank needs my money too!

Even if I can't afford it, I can still think about it. I'm going to lose more weight, and feel better. That isn't going to make me smarter or more money savvy. I've been quite dumb in the money area. I don't think that will change.
What will change is my attitude. I am happy.
Wal Mart will be my place of choice as long as the government takes the money I earn is such huge quantities.
So Be It.

Short and sweet

While discussing food choices, I found something new for me:
I started adding a teaspoon or two of Vanilla Protein powder to my yogurt in the morning. I also started eating my yogurt before I eat my oatmeal. This puts the protein first in my stomach. I used to eat the oatmeal first since it was hot.
The oatmeal doesn't really have that much protein in it, so this is better for me.

My breakfast lasts me until I get home for my next meal, and it gives me the fiber I need, since I don't take in wheat and gluten products.

• One packet of Quaker Oats Weight Control oatmeal, with one or two teaspoons of Benefiber for the added fiber.
  

• One container of Chobani yogurt, with one or two teaspoons of protein powder added.

• Add one banana.

That is a lot for me to take in. Many times, I don't eat it all. But I try to get as much as I can because of the fiber. I get so blocked up without it.

I also add Benefiber to my other meals where it will dissolve.
Believe me, it helps.

The vanilla powder is pretty much neutral as far as flavor is concerned. I am not a real fan of protein powder, but then again, I haven't found any decent flavored protein anything. I just put up with it because I have to. Mixed in with the yogurt it is just fine because Chobani is low in sugar (other than the fruit in the bottom) and pretty bland for the most part.

As far as other forms of protein, I have protein bars (detour bars with lower sugar), and they leave a lot to be desired as far as taste also. But, I like the consistency of them, and that satisfies my need to chew.

I still drink Dunkin Donuts decaf coffee every morning. (bad boy!) Sweet and Low, with skim milk. When the one girl is there, I get a small squirt of caramel or mocha. I can drink it plain too.
Since I am a creature of habit, I can alter my food choices, or keep them the same...it doesn't matter much. I do have certain things I won't give up, but so far, they haven't been overwhleming.

• I don't do sugar, and don't miss it.

• I don't drink alcohol. I haven't had a drink since 1982, and really miss it! LOL. Oh life without beer......almost not worth living!
• I do have dark chocolate in the form of a little square in the afternoon. Just one small square, instead of the whole box.

• I do cheat on my gluten-free diet on the weekends. One slice of pizza will not kill me. I even leave the crust on the plate. Give me a break.

I am so much more active now, and I feel great.
I am watching my health very carefully, and going through counseling to stay on track.
Life is good.

A bus driver's woes

I am a bus driver. I am tired of driving because it's getting hard to drive in traffic.
I don't see as well as I used to, even though my eyes have improved to the point where I can't wear my glasses while driving anymore.
I come up as 20/15 or better, so I still see better than most people.
But, I don't move my head as much, I don't have as much patience as I did, and traffic is worse than it used to be.
The way the vehicles are made today, are much different than they used to be. Not as much fun.
The kids are different too.
And me......

So, I am looking to do something else.
What do I have experience doing?

I can drive anything, but I don't want to anymore.

I can play guitar, bass, and sing.

I can sell stuff. I am a good salesman.

I think I might be able to write. But, so can millions of others.

So, while I am searching for a new career, I will continue to write my blog, and lose weight.

Saturday was a few days ago.

On Saturday, I woke my wife up earlier than her noontime sleep, to get her to go with me to Inner Harbor in Baltimore.

We met our daughter, along with both of our grand kids and went to the National Aquarium.

This trip was a request of my wife, with help from me and my daughter. It was kind of my daughter's idea, after I pushed my wife to go visit them at their home in Maryland. Am I confusing anyone?

So, I brought a long 2 bottles of O2, one carrier, and an extra bottle in case we ran out. The large bottles we have only last about 2 hours at the rate my wife uses them. She likes to use them while walking because her O2 levels go really low. When she is sitting, she is OK without it.

So, I carried the case with the Bottle while she walked along.
My grand daughter was very bubbly and happy to be there, and tagged along happily chasing the pigeons and sea gulls.

We went through the members entrance to the Aquarium since my daughter has a yearly membership. We walked right past the crowds waiting to get inside.

Once there, we went over and procured the use of a wheel chair for my wife. I was able to hang the bottle on the back, and away we went. Everywhere there was a line, someone would wave us over, and we butted up in line. I liked that.

After awhile, my daughter gave me her backpack which held all the stuff she needed for an infant and a 2.5 year old. It weighed in at about 10 pounds. I also had my Panasonic lumix to try to take pictures as I walked along. That was fun (not really). I wasn't used to pushing, carrying, and juggling all at the same time.

Needless to say, this is something I couldn't do two years ago for 5 minutes, let alone the 3 or 4 hours we spent there.
We used the elevator for many of our level changes, and that was interesting too because some of them came out at the end of that particular display. So, we had to walk through the crowds fighting traffic.

Getting to see the fish tanks turned out to be easier than I thought. People would back into us, say something like "oh, excuse me!" and then they moved out of the way. Nice!

My wife had Jackson on her lap most of the time. She talked to him and explained things to him, even though he is well under a year old and had no clue what he was doing there. He liked the pastel colors of the various tanks, and probably enjoyed the company too.

So, when we got to this moving ramp instead of a stairway, I decided to try it with the wheel chair. I managed to get the thing centered and then was amazed at how heavy it got as we started going up. I couldn't push it up in order to shorten the trip because there were always people in front of us. Man oh man did it get heavy! I'm glad none of the staff tried to stop me because finding the elevator and bucking traffic was harder than holding the wheelchair from falling backwards....but not by much. My grand daughter at one point came up behind me and put her hand on my butt to help me hold grandma from falling backwards. Goosed by a two year old! There were several of these ramps, and they varied in length and angle. I was able to hold the chair and not transmit my fear of impending failure to anyone in the family. Besides, it was a great workout!

Well, we wandered around with our entourage for a few hours until I realized that I hadn't had anything to eat or drink since my morning meal. I couldn't even find a water fountain. They have several places to eat, but every one of them was loaded with people and required waiting in line, which I despise. So, I finally had to give in when we got to the Jellyfish exhibit. The cafeteria was large and seemed to have plenty of seating. The lines weren't that long, so we entered one.

Now, I don't profess to understand women in any way shape or form. My wife and daughter couldn't decide what they wanted to eat. In this type of situation, I just grab what I can and go. But they had to decide. There was a line for hot food prepared by the staff, and there were already prepped salads and subs. We could grab them, pay, and then eat. What could be simpler?

I grabbed a chicken Cesar salad. I got my wife to grab another type of salad and my daughter to take a sub, but my grand daughter wanted a "hot dog", which required us to stay in line. My daughter managed to talk her into getting a cup of yogurt instead. Problem solved until my wife saw the "Starbucks" sign at the counter. I grabbed her a frappachino bottle from the pre prepped counter and we moved to the checkout. (I'm leaving here right after I finish this. We will go over to Dunkin Donuts where I will buy her a drink and doughnut of her choice).

So, we managed to get our food and actually eat. I ate the strips of chicken and gave some to Lilly (my grand daughter), along with many of the croutons. She looked so cute with a yogurt ring around her mouth while chomping on her chicken piece. No complaints from her, just good old fashioned protein.
I hadn't had anything to drink all day, but managed to find a water fountain and got a few sips later in the day.
I continued to carry the backpack and camera while pushing the chair for the rest of the trip. I had fun again going down the ramps inside the shark tank. They were stationary and wide enough for me to get a good grip and hold on while walking/pulling backwards.

The trip ended with us giving back the wheelchair and heading out to the parking garage. Lilly was exhausted and cranky. Jackson was asleep in his belly pack, and I was pleasantly sore.

We had to stop once so my wife could rest, but the trip was good.

One thing I have to mention were the prices. OUCH!
$6.95 for the salad. A few strips of chicken and some lettuce.
$4.25 for a bottle of Frappachino. UGH.
The parking for 4 hours cost $20.00. Holy cow. And they didn't even wash and wax the car!

My daughter got a 10% discount for paying for us to get into the aquarium, which was around $25.00 each. We didn't get to see the dolphin show or their 4D show. That's extra.

Oh well, it was worth it.

We got lost in Baltimore because I tried to go around some major congestion on 83 North. That was OK too because we got to see part of the city we never saw before.
I am a bit sore today, but not bad enough to worry about. I wouldn't have been able to do this two years ago.
Life is Good!

Slider food

At our weight loss group meeting the other night, I heard talk about how to get liquids into our system.
Something came up which surprised me because I was already doing it and didn't realize it.
After a meal, I usually have a slider food.
This is because I an dry and really would like to drink something with my meal, but because of restrictions, can't.
A slider food is a smooth food, such as a pudding, or jello type food.
I use 60 calorie sugar free jello pudding. I also buy the store brand to save money.
I also sometimes eat a sugar free Healthy Choice fudge bar. That has 100 calories.
This satisfies my liquid craving until I can take a drink an hour later.

Time to rake the leaves!

This is a post that I think didn't get published. I don't know why. This is from a few weeks ago. Anyway, here it is:

The leaves of brown came tumbling down, remember? That September in the rain.

An old standard song listed above. The only problem is my silver Maple isn't even starting to turn brown yet. It's still green. All the neighbor's trees are dropping leaves like crazy....on my yard!

So, I will use my new Honda Mower, and the leaf blower, and rake, to clean them up. Then, I will turn my back, and all the leaves will fall again, and it will look like I didn't do anything.

Life in the suburbs.

My wife is very sick, and we are not sure what is going to happen. We get the test results on Tuesday 10/27/9. My life will change drastically no matter what the results are.

My son never came back to finish what he started. He decided he has to move, and is going to move out of the area and change jobs. I wish him well, and wonder what I will do with my yard. I don't have the equipment or money to clean up the holes he left. There are roots and stumps there that I can't dig out. I think I will save and cover them up this spring with lots of mulch, and then put some small plants there. I did try to dig as much as I could, but didn't get too far with my shovel.

I did cut and trim all of the bushes around the house for the winter. We have butterfly bushes that I cut down to the ground. They will grow back stronger next year. The rose bushes are still blooming, so I will wait another week or so to chop them down.

Now, I have a huge pile of cut bushes behind the garage. I started to trim them down and lay them out into piles that I can haul away sometime soon. With the leaves, I think I will be busy for awhile.

Protein powder, and other improvements.

At our WL support group meeting last night, someone asked how we take our protein, and how do we get our daily allowance of liquid.
I am a creature of habit, so I pretty much stick to the same thing over and over. This allows me to concentrate on other things, and I don't mind at all.
I do, however, keep my eyes open for new ideas.
When I first started this diet plan, I tried different types of protein to see which ones I liked. I tried this liquid that was contained in a tube because on the label it told me it had more protein than most other types of protein. It tasted terrible.
Last night, I found out I was using it wrong. If I had taken the time to mix it with water to dilute it, I might have liked it better. Oh well.
I started using powder because I really like milk shakes and this was the closest thing I could find. The problem was, I couldn't digest it very well. It stuck in my throat, and made me feel bloated.
So, about two weeks ago, I ran out of milk, so I mixed up my protein with water instead. Wow, what a difference. The stuff tasted good. It went down and stayed down just fine. It wasn't as thick or rich as a milkshake, but I can live with it.
I mixed the chocolate protein powder with strawberry the other day, and I like that. I also add a packet or two of Sweet and low since I still like sweet stuff.
My chili has evolved too. Much of the time I don't get the fresh veggies to add to it. I add frozen veggies. I alternate between three different kinds of meat. Ground (angus very lean), beef cubes (a bit more fat), and Bison (very lean and tasty).
I am looking for new recipes now so I can expand my skills as a cook. The problem is, I like my chili too much!
I bought some rice and prepared it in a separate container. It's the kind of rice that you have to cook for like 45 minutes, and it is sticky. I love the flavor and texture, and I add it into my chili as a small enhancement. I am afraid to eat too much at a time because the stuff can expand and stretch my pouch. But, I do love the full feeling that rice gives me. I don't feel comfortably full too often, and rice gives me that feeling.
Many of the pre and new post people there last night weren't sure how to get their full allowance of liquid. I didn't get the chance to tell them that I get mine through much of my food. My tomatoes in the chili have lots of liquid, as does some of the other food I eat. They are not soupy, but just moist enough to go down easy. Barry was right about the liquid when he spoke of it in his blog.

Raking leaves and other exercise

If you look at the neighbor's yard, you can see what would happen if I left the leaves there instead of raking every day.
I moved from cutting the lawn to raking the leaves.
I have a leaf blower, and my new Honda mower has two blades to chop up the leaves, but I needed to burn off some frustration, so I picked up my new rake.
It's a metal ended fan type rake, with a spring bar across it. It has a wood handle, but it also has a bit of plastic, but that's OK.
It is very similar to the old style rakes. Just the right size, not too big, or small. Just right.
I have a few mature trees in the vicinity of my yard.
First, I cut the lawn lower than the rest of the year. This allows the wind to blow any leaves without them getting stuck in my yard.
Then, I rake leaves. I rake them every day. I do this for exercise since I can just as easily use the leaf blower, or lawn mower, or a combination.
I actually have two rakes, and use them like a big claw to pick up the leaves and put them into the paper bags the Borough supplies.
The workout is both for me, and the yard. The rake cleans out debris, and loosens the soil below. A leaf blower and lawn mower don't do that.
My mower can also collect the leaves. It does a nice job, but to me, it's easier to rake them, instead of emptying the bag every few minutes. The bag will work well when I want to finish the job, and just pick up what's left over.
This year, I raked all the leaves into a pile around the Silver Maple tree. Other years, I have raked them into the bushes around the house as a mulch. And, I have collected them in the bags and put them out to the curb for pick up.
One year, I was lucky enough to have a mulching machine, and I put all of them in there. It reduced the pile down to almost nothing.
Anyway, the exercise is nice. I rake down the one side using a left to right movement. I do a right to left movement coming back. I also exaggerate my movements in order to exercise and stretch more. I can work up a good sweat because there is a lot to do. It can take me as much as an hour to get them all. I only do the back yard because the front doesn't have any trees.
Well, my neighbors think I'm crazy for working so hard, but I don't want to exercise inside when I can do it outside. And, it keeps me out of trouble.

Full circle

So, I ramble some more today, just to fill the lines:

• With all the positive stuff going on in my life, I have so many things trying to bring me down. Oh my, what a test.
• A great speaker is coming back to our WL support group meeting. She has spoken two other times, and is the only counselor I know in the area that has also gone through the surgery herself. She understands the problems and has common sense solutions.
  
• The weight loss has come to a halt for now. My wife's medical conditions have contributed. My son and his problems are helping. And, I am allowing these things to have an effect. I'm not perfect.
• I need to find a full time, great paying job. I don't want to overwork and burn myself out. I don't have a clue what to do next. I am in between two piles of really good hay. I could take the traditional route and work for a "real" company, and a "real" job. I hate that thought. I'm not a traditional guy.
• My garage is full of my son's junk. I want him to move into his new place and get his stuff out of my house. I told him he could store it for a week and a half. That is way too long. Oh well, I did it myself.
• My cars both need work. They are Honda so they will chug along until I can catch up.
• My medical bills are starting to pile up. I realized that over the years, I must have paid at least a half million dollars (I had to write that out) to them over and above my insurance. I will spend at least that in the next 12 months. And, they still send me late notices, and pile more bills on me. They are a great hospital, but they have their issues.
• 205, 204,203, 204, 205. Come on now. Time to hit 199! Damn, this is hard!
  

What to do when things happen that you have no control over.

This one is important to me. It is very personal, so close your eyes while reading, and get a tissue.

This really is serious, but I handle serious things with a bit of humor in order to get through them. Nothing else to do but cry, and I will get to do that in private as time goes on.

Weight loss surgery has changed my life. It gave me a future instead of a premature ending.

I am not afraid of death. I was until I did some studying and praying, and found answers that I can accept.

I am afraid of wasting away to nothing, or going through great pain while getting there. That may not be rational, but that's me.

So, a few years ago, as I said in a previous post, I prayed harder than I ever did before. I asked for God to either kill me or make me better. A bit selfish, but that's the best I could do. It was a simple request.
God must have decided to let me live and made me better. I found Gastric Bypass, lost weight, and am learning how to live again.

Now, while I am so happy to be alive again, I got some sad news this past month.

My wife has breast cancer.

Normally, breast cancer is not a death sentence, but in her case, it will probably be.

She had Hodgkin's disease in 1974. She was treated with the new technology at the time, which was radiation therapy. It cured her. But, they didn't have the knowledge they have today, and they irradiated her upper body with too much radiation.
It burned her lungs, and it gave her breast cancer.
She has many other medical problems that are all part of her previous treatment.
The good thing, is that I got to meet her. I married her. I lived with her for 34 years. I had two great kids with her. I now have 5 grand kids with her.
Unless there is a miracle, she will not see our next wedding anniversary.
She is upbeat, and glad to be alive. She will continue to work as long as she can. She will be productive.

How will this affect my WLS?

It may slow me down, but I have learned how to do things differently now, and I will continue to practice what I've learned.